"Why its Meat-mas day sir!"
"Meat-mas day? Then I haven't missed it!"
-Beefsteak Whetherbottem A Meatmas Carol
Ah Meatmas. My favorite time of year. Children having BBQ fights in the front yard, Roasted leg of lamb on an open fire, and lets not forget kissing the one you love under the flank steak in the entryway.
Woah wait what?! You ask what is Meatmas?! You've never heard of it? Well sir and/or madam I shall tell you.
Meatmas is a tradition that started in my department at my work about 5 years ago around the Christmas holiday. Its really a special day that is broken down by two major events.
1. The traditional office round of Yankee Swap: In which everyone brings something awesome and I bring something slightly less awesome and someone gets slightly screwed out of a good gift as I myself take the better one home. Follow? Look, I know its not good to bring a white elephant to a Yankee swap, I wouldn't do that. I get the rules. You want good gifts, but you need a reason for people to steal. If everything is equally good, what's the fun in that. This year I brought a DVD of my movie 305. People were less than thrilled. Its not a bad movie, its just not a good gift... really ever.
Oh Meatmas. You come and go so quickly. It's a great tradition that comes a week or two before christmas and for me and I think I may want to bring it to my family some day. I'll invent some charming lie of an origin story to tell my kids about the pilgrims only having cows to eat during one cold Christmas and how they were so thankful for red meat or something. I'll use it as a way to break from the hustle and bustle of the holidays by stuffing my children so much they will take naps. We as a family shall come closer, and in a way that's what the holidays are for. That and ribs.